1. Draw up the guest list with the best man or maid of honour
Start with the list, checked discreetly with the best man, maid of honour or witnesses and sometimes the partner. It determines everything else: the number of places, the budget and the kind of activities that are possible.
2. Pick the date early
A hen or stag party usually takes place a few weeks before the wedding. Suggest two or three weekends to the guests and go with the one that suits the most people. Give at least two months’ notice: it often means booking a weekend off work.
3. Announce the budget with the invitation
Not all guests have the same budget. Give an estimate per person from the start, and say whether the bride’s or groom’s share is split between the guests (this is the most common arrangement). Nobody likes finding out the bill at the end.
4. Build the programme around the guest of honour
The right programme is one that suits them, not one that makes the group laugh at their expense. A good balance: one star activity (workshop, sport, escape game, tasting), a good meal, an evening out, and free time. Plan an alternative for guests who can only come for half a day.
5. Keep it a surprise
All the planning has to happen without the guest of honour. Create a dedicated group chat without them, and watch out for messages sent to the wrong conversation by mistake.
6. Handle upfront payments and repayments
One or two organisers often front a lot of money (accommodation, activities). Log each expense as you go and ask for repayments quickly. Our guide to splitting the costs of a trip explains the method in detail.
The hen / stag party checklist
- Guest list approved with the best man, maid of honour or witnesses
- Date chosen at least two months ahead
- Budget per person announced
- Accommodation and main activity booked
- Programme shared with the guests (not with the guest of honour)
- Expenses logged and repayments tracked